By Matt Allen - a new regular contributor to The Wired Angler.
Who died and declared that bass boats should inherit the role of Noah's Ark? Every new color, new trailer, hook, weight, swimbait, seems to find its way onto the boat two by two. After all, what would happen if we only had one and it got stuck? Unfortunately this tends to lead to a messy boat. My own craft is a perfect testament to what can happen if left unchecked! Insert the Cluster#$%& Compartment. It is truly a work of genius and every boat should have one!
I have decided to unveil my cluster#$%& and let you all have a look at the genius behind it! The theory is quite simple; since bass fisherman own way too much crap it is essential to dedicate one entire compartment to chaos! In doing so, the remainder of the boat is allowed to stay (in theory) clutter free.
The downfall of the cluster#$%& is simply that if left unchecked it will spread. Thus, bi-monthly cleaning is required to ensure that the cluster#$%& stays in its place! My cluster#$%& is approximately 3 months late on its cleaning so it should be a prime example of what can happen if left unchecked.
This first photo shows the cluster#$%& in all its glory:
This next photo depicts what is actually in there:
The writing of this blog post inspired me to actually sort through the mess and decide what needed to stay and what could be thrown away. In doing so I came up with the:
TOP 5 oddities from my own personal cluster
5) A very dirty, seemingly lonely, permanently-bent 7" Senko: A Senko in and of itself is not odd. What fascinates me about this particular Senko is that its a color I hate, and there are no hook marks in it...Hmm. Where did it come from?
4) Empty Uncle Josh Pork Jars: Sure, I could understand 1 empty jar, but 4? No wonder my boat is going slower these days! I wonder how much trash is stuffed everywhere else!
3) 97 cents: Not really sure how that got in there but my momma didn't raise no fool! Never turn down money!
2) Pink crappie jigs: First off, I didn't crappie fish at all this year. Second, if I did it wouldn't be with a pink bait! If I wasn't the one taking the pictures I'd think this was rigged. But here is what I really want to know, Why did DEAN ROJAS endorse them?!
1) Unknown shopping list: Why would an unknown shopping list make the first spot on my list? What would be on a shopping list that would make it unique? It's funny I would choose to use the word "unique" isn't it? (bear in mind that this list isn't even in my hand writing.) The shopping list takes the number one place on my list because its an order for "Unique Gun Powder". I think one of my fishing buddies has some explaining to do!
In closing, I thoroughly recommend
that you invest in a cluster#$%& of your own. However, be careful who adds
to it, and never forget your bi-monthly cleaning!
Awesome...it is good to see that I am not the only one with a compartment dedicated to miscellaneous crap. The only difference is I really don't have room in my boat for a Cluster #&%# Compartment, yet I do anyway
Posted by: Sacto John | December 09, 2009 at 09:04 AM